I am drawn with lines
that by their composition
ought unwavering to delineate
harmony from hope,
yet which in the quavering
quiet of silken dawn
have become such loose
configurations, figuring
nothing more substantial
nor more reasonable than
a porously palletted dusk,
a pondering of apathetic dread.

And yet I weep for you
for the loss of you still,
for the incessant chattering
of this soul mournfully
decrying another day,
another solitary night—
silent now fall, o you
entombed by an abundance
of sins no more egregious
than that of the moon
who looks ever on and on
and does nothing more.

İstanbul 02 January 2021


savage hunger

his sacred savage hunger
harries her terrified soul
torn and tormented by years
of most callous abuse

she clawing clings to the
shell of her tormented self
selling another patch of flesh
just to appease his need

but it is never enough, no!
her fear sloughs aside another day
another year, desperate to hear
a voice of tender tones

longing to feel the touch
of one who might caress
her heart with gentlest hope
and sing her blissful need

yet in the darkest moments
drowning in deathly solitude
she believes she has no choice
but to kiss the demon lips

of despair

[Thank you, Allison, for finding just the right words.]

Image from Pixabay

drink me insane

colour me blue
no, bluer still
blending reds
with anguish
that deeply drains
Herakles of strength
and leaves Sheba
a hopeless ascetic

cry me intemperate
simpering silly sod
that I am most
willing to be
so long as leaves
insist on dancing
and trees tempt
my eager touch

drink me insane
for my reason
has fitfully fled
failing to grasp
the inanities of
your humanities
when the easiest
thing of all is to

just love

[Inspired by A Writer’s Soul’s “drink me (insane)” at https://awriterssoulblog.wordpress.com/2021/02/06/drink-me-insane/ ]


the weight of your words
was more than i could bear
dreadfully tipping scales
tottering on unadorned tables
scratched clean by the claws
of my grayly craven past

it was never really about you
nor yet about fervent us
with no blame attributed
i pondered the fatal dearth
of my forgiveness—not for you
please understand, but for me

with each word that fell
from your precisely shaped lips
with each ounce of your
carefully pronounced certainty
the left bowl dipped and
the right leg slipped until

it all collapsed
quite perfectly


the third rock that i threw
frightened me most of all
the vehemence of it
the jagged waves rippling out
and in like fangs bared

and when the water grew still
on bended knee i peered within
and saw a sullen dwarf
babbling about babies and trees
with a lisp that tore my soul

i wept at the sight and sound
of my self so poorly patterned
that i could wander naked
through each day unseen, unheard
amusing to a fault

one man’s folly

night and day and once more please
as time undaunted and immeasurable
being the most equitable of streams
flows on with unrivalled indifference
over paling pebbles and tumbling sand
and me, though incredulous I may be
ever daring tyrant time to finally cease
or to pause at the very least and honor
my whims as the water lushly laughs
at the absurdly colored wonder of it all:
this man’s arrogantly self-imposed folly

Salt Lake City 12 Jan 2013

another step

i have known the bitter taste of hope
have dreaded its inevitable return
in vain rejecting with dejected demeanor
its perpetual patterning shrouding
my ponderous journey with futility

i have bemoaned how hungrily
this hope has companioned my steps
tracing subtle distinctions between
fallacy and faith like an impassioned
preacher of very earthly means

i have embraced an angry diffidence
as if indifference might as well
a panacea provide, shielding blindly
the coy glances, the voluptuous
enveloping entreaties of this hope

little did i suspect in my despair
that life would ever speak to me again
proposing just one more journey
beyond this daily febrile delirium
to a realm of passion and honest joy

and having heard its message

i take another step

Salt Lake City 10 Nov 2012

’tis time

oh yes, my darlings
he said to the faeries that
tittering giggled in surprise
there is indeed an end

though ye ken it not
and would nae do so
not for all the love ye
have so sweetly pledged

and here his voice, it must
be said, an edge acquired of
steel sharpened by constraint
and years of angry solitude

a wall of hardiest stone
that knows not time
nor construes its passing
being oh so broadly built

a barrier most restrictive
limiting the amorous tricks
this heart may yet perform
on your dearest behalf

an end to the weight
these shoulders weary bear
to the words this voice
may timid trembling utter

how mournful murmur
these lips for want of you
how palsied quiver
these hands for need of you

however convenient a man
I may be, a man yet I am
with the needs of such
and desires unfulfilled

as mortal flesh decays and
even the sun a setting knows
so too my darlings should ye ken
that there is indeed an end

Salt Lake City 30 Oct 2012

it is enough

these tears
my dears are not for you
but for the precious moon
as it weary wanes beneath
a deeply withered sky

this self
so poorly calculated
in unrefinèd strokes
stares neatly numbered
into shifting shadows

this heart
though yet it beats
petty and unneeded
bleeds such angry words
unheeded by even she

this soul
bare and damnèd dwells
in darkly painted cells
pacing back and forth
over discarded sheaves

this voice
echoes foolishly futile
while petulant pleading
that time still breeding
hope should finally cease

and yet
do you wonder why i
should ever dare to dream
of still and empty fields
and richly silent hills

it is enough
that i once was

it is enough
that you once knew

Salt Lake City 01 Sep 2012


we are shrouded in noise
i thought as i turned down the music
and pondered why–
turning it off completely
i listened — just that, and realized
that it is we who surround ourselves
with this cacophonous cocoon
willfully, needfully

and i think i see why
we encumber our lives with sound
and song and frantic shouts
with whimpers and whispers
and clicks and creaks
with endless bloody noise
why it is we indulge the senses
so desperately

closing my eyes, i waited
and wondered and felt and
knew something at that moment
something unperceived:
how easy it is to hear silence
echoing within the vast cavern
of nothingness at the core
of this fragile being

i shuddered and wiped my eyes
it matters, i thought
turning the music back on
this matters when the only voice
is your own, expiring unheard
and you long for another
just one other voice
to announce, “I am here.”

Salt Lake City 22 Aug 2012